


Into Darkness, Into Light

by Jaelijn



Category: Blake's 7
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Spoilers, Suicidal Thoughts, hence the spoilers..., so the character death is canonical and only referenced
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-16
Updated: 2018-09-16
Packaged: 2019-07-13 02:47:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16008689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaelijn/pseuds/Jaelijn
Summary: Vila and Avon, and two instances of not being happy.





	1. Into Darkness

Vila slammed the door behind him, kicking at the small drift of snow that had gathered at the door. He hated the snow and the cold, but he couldn’t stand it in there anymore.

Alphas, the lot of them, even Avon, with whom he sometimes shared a thoroughly dishonest impulse. But there they were, talking politics and rebellion and sniping at each other and not getting anywhere or getting anything done. Whoever had decided to put Alphas in charge must have been soft in the head – all those pretty words, and what actions? Dangerous raids that got people killed and made nothing better for anyone.

Vila stomped away from the door and was promptly showered in a flurry of snow slipping from the roof. He shook himself, shuddering. “Ugh, just what I needed,” he grumbled, but kept walking, thermal boots sinking into the white cold wetness.

They could have had a bit of fun out here, in the thermal suits, if Blake had only let them. Vila had looked up a few things – snow could be shaped, into figures and balls, and he’d have liked to see Avon’s face when Vila pitched a snowball right into that furry hood of his thermal suit.

Vila stopped walking and gazed down over the snow-covered hills and the small buildings scattered about, the lights within the only illumination. The night hadn’t really brought darkness, even the sparse light sources were reflected back brilliantly by the snow cover. “Gan would have liked this,” he muttered under his breath, speaking to no one.

Gan was dead.

His one friend, a bit paternalistic sometimes, perhaps, but a mate nonetheless. The only other non-Alpha on board the _Liberator_ , if you didn’t count Cally – and Cally, bless her, was an alien and didn’t really understand the grade system and what it meant for Vila’s life. And even she didn’t really look at him as an equal.

“Bottom of the ranks, you are, Vila,” Vila told himself and kicked at the snow again. He was toasty warm in his suit, but somehow he felt that he should be feeling the cold. Perhaps if he just turned down his suit a little, just for a moment?

He reached up towards the dial, but a gloved hand caught his arm, pulling Vila’s back down.

“What are you doing?” Avon snarled sharply in the quiet night. “Do you want to freeze to death?”

Vila snatched his arm away. “So what if I did? You’d care?”

Avon lifted an eyebrow, making it disappear under the faux fur trimming of his hood. “Eager to deprive our intrepid leader of the pleasure of getting us killed?”

“Didn’t ask you to join me.” For once, Vila stood his ground under the cutting gaze. “And don’t you dare say a word about Gan. You didn’t even like him.”

Avon’s other eyebrow rose to join the first in its hiding place under the fur. “I didn’t say anything,” he said, a peculiar lilt in his voice.

“Right,” Vila mumbled, tearing his gaze away. “You could have, though. Make Blake pull out before it happened; he listens to you.”

Avon made a sound that might have been a snort, or a laugh. “Not from where I was standing – and give me some credit, Vila – I did try.”

“Try harder next time.”

“Oh, I will, believe me.” Avon turned, brushing against Vila’s shoulder. “Now come back inside, fool. Believe it or not, you’re actually needed for this part of the plan.”


	2. Into Light

Avon stood outside in the glaring sun, as if it could burn away the darkness that had settled into his mind. He absently rubbed his wrist with the opposite thumb, as if feeling his pulse could make him feel alive – as if, pressing just a little deeper, he could make the life visible.

“Avon? There you are!” Vila, coming up behind him. “Come out of the sun. We all have spacers’ skin now; you’ll burn.”

He could tolerate Vila. Any of the others, he would have left standing. “Don’t you ever listen? Orac says the radiation of this planet’s sun is harmless to human skin.” He dropped his hand from his pulse point. He hadn’t felt anything. His voice sounded dead even to his own ears. Perhaps he _had_ died and hadn’t even noticed. Perhaps Servalan’s meddling with his perception had done… something. Or perhaps he was still trapped in an illusion, and none of this was real.

But no. It was too depressing not to be real.

“No, I listened,” Vila said, scrambling over the rocks and bushes to step beside him. “Orac said it was safe _for limited periods of time_. What are you doing out here, anyway? Tarrant get on your nerves?”

He hadn’t, as a matter of fact. Avon had expected the snide remarks, the blaming to have started by now, now that they had secured their survival and the… locals were gone. They had been quick with it on Terminal, before… well. No one had really said anything after Dorian’s grisly demise. “Found any pink asteroids yet?”

“No. Don’t remind me.” Vila was making a face – Avon could hear it in his voice, even without turning. There was a pause.

“Did you ask Orac how long a _limited time_ was? That box can be irritatingly vague when it suits him, have you noticed? Well, have you?”

Avon sighed; Vila’s outpouring of words barely registering as anything that was intended to make sense. “Spare me, Vila.”

Another pause, heavier than before. Avon could hear Vila breathing heavily from the climb up here, in the full sun, and resisted the urge to feel for his pulse again.

“I miss her too, you know,” Vila mumbled suddenly, so quietly that Avon almost missed it.

“No,” he said.

“What’d you mean, no?!”

“I don’t know. How could I know.” Avon shuddered and drew his jacket closer about himself.

“Eh?”

“You said, ‘I miss her too, you know’. I don’t.”

“It’s a turn of phrase! All right, deflect if you like! What do I care. For all I care, you can stand outside here until you’re fried to a crisp.”

“Not enough for a sandwich,” Avon murmured, an echo of a memory from long ago. He’d just come out here to feel warm, but it didn’t seem to be working. He had never thought of himself as someone who persisted with an action that had proven futile.

As Vila’s angry steps stirred up the rubble on the hill behind him, Avon turned his back to the sun and followed him back to the base.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was first published (in two parts) as part of issue 2 of the all things B7 zine (completely free and digital) that I had the pleasure of editing for the second time now, [Rebels and Fools](https://rebelsandfools.tumblr.com/). You can find the details and the download link to the issue under [this link](https://rebelsandfools.tumblr.com/post/177590143533/rebels-and-fools-issue-2)!


End file.
